Unfortunate Guy

This is the sound of the world's smallest violinThis is the sound of the world's smallest violin

I've seen worse than the worst trouble you've been in

You're the greatest sufferer that almost never was born

You've always been the object of ridicule and scorn

You hold the title of champion stepchild

Your father died in prison and your mother ran wild

Maybe you should write a book on pieces of confetti

Coz it makes even Shakespeare's plots seem meaningless and petty

You've had it rough you've made it very clear

That you don't give up you've persevered (no matter how severe)

Please don't go on you're gonna make me cry

You've got to be

The most unfortunate guy

Don't go on you're gonna make us cry

The most unfortunate guy

I've heard some sad luck stories, but yours tops the list

And you lead the race for the world's unluckiest

You wear that crown of thorns and sit upon that throne

You rule a kingdom of despair and you do it all alone

You have our sympathy our deepest regrets

You hold the key, which unlocks misfortune's chest

You're giving us the poor mouth what do you stand to gain

You're soakin up the sun after selling us the rain