No Deal

Now this man down at the used car lot

Tried to sell me four wheels and a trunk.

I said, "Man, there is no engine!",

He said, "The engine's just a bunch of junk.

You don't need no engine to go downhill

And I could plainly see, that that's the direction

You're headed in", and he handed me the keys.

(I said) No deal you can't sell this stuff to me

No deal, I'm going back to Tennessee

Well, I went to a doctor of the highest order,

He said I couldn't have a drink for a year.

One glass of wine on my birthday

If my birthday wasn't too very near.

Lord, he must have put me in a state of shock

'cause I made it for about two weeks

Then he sent me a bill

That knocked me flat off the wagon

And back down on my feet.

When true love knocked upon my door

She'd just barely turned fifteen

And I was a little bit nervous

If you know just what I mean.

But I've heard somewhere

That true love conquers all

And I figured that was that

Then I started having dreams 'bout

Being chased out of town

Wearing nothing but my cowboy hat.

Well, I come through this life a stumbler, my friends

I expect to die that way

It could be twenty years from now

It could be most any day.

But if there is no whiskey and women, Lord,

Behind them heavenly doors

I'm gonna take my chances down below,

And of that you can be sure.