All Your Kayfabe Friends

Well, this is slept in the weird position

And your back and your shoulders are aching

I say my stomach is chewing its way out from the inside

'Cause I've gone 3 days now without eating

I died on the cross trainer getting in shape for you

I failed at the first hurdle, you told me I always do

You asked if I'd be anyone from history

Fact or fiction, dead or alive

I said I'll be Tony Cascarino, circa 1995

We're feeling so much more content

Knowing where our allegiances lie

Since our kayfabe friends have upped and left you and I

The time we spent around each other's waist

The time spent expressing my distaste

With my eyes on the light bulb

I choose to keep your birthday present for myself

The candles, your ill health

I'm being paid 35 pence an hour

As a specialist foot fetish model

Flatten my arches, I pirouette for them

I pick the [Incomprehensible] my ingrown toenail

You think you're the needle

That drains the blood donation

You're just a repetition

On an old worn out pincushion

We're feeling so much more content

Knowing where our allegiances lie

Since our kayfabe friends have upped and left you and I

As the bus pulls away I stare at the last film

Before we hit the city, that emotional minefield

I seduced your ex-boyfriend to help you get over him

He found you more attractive, it helped you get over me

We're feeling so much more content

Knowing where our allegiances lie

Since our kayfabe friends have upped and left you and I

In the shower, I chew the soap bar

From the plastic the morning after

I love the look of empty in your eyes

I love the look of lust between your thighs